Well, I finished my first assignment! Can I just say what a relief that is? I have to admit that it was a real struggle to finish that paper. It was MUCH tougher to articulate my own personal sense of Christian calling than I thought it would be but here's what I came up with:
I am a Christian. I have significance and purpose because God has called me into a relationship with him. I am in the process of “…becoming what I am not yet but (have been) called by God to be”(30). It is a journey of self-discovery in light of who God says I am and who he has created me to be. Quite honestly, it would be very easy to become so inwardly focused that I could lose sight of the fact that God called me to himself for a purpose. I love how Guinness expresses this: “The truth is not that God is finding us a place for our gifts but that God has created us and our gifts for a place of his choosing – and we will only be ourselves when we are finally there”(46). I believe that the place of his choosing at this time in my life is exactly where I find myself. It is partly about location which is Port Hardy, but is mostly about relationships. I know that the occupation I currently find myself in is truly a privilege. I am a stay at home mom and wife. My job is really more of a role than an occupation. The work that I find myself doing is complicated and demanding yet ordinary and mundane. It’s stretching and challenging and there really is no more practical place to work out the secondary callings on my life. I agree with Guinness that you shouldn’t “…necessarily be able to state your calling in a single sentence. At best you can only specify a part of it”(51). I realize that there are callings in my life that I’m probably not aware of yet and most likely there are also callings that will be in process for the rest of my life but at this point in my life and in my relationship with God I am beginning to recognize calling in my life in two different but related areas. First of all, God has been challenging me to mature in the area of emotional health and spiritual growth. He is calling me to pursue maturity in my relationships which relates entirely to my ability to parent and to be a godly wife and complement to my husband. I don’t think that this calling is by any means specific to only me except that the circumstances and means by which God placed this call on my life were indeed very personal. I know that this calling is wrapped up in the corporate calling on my life however in the last two years God has been orchestrating events and cultivating desires and gifts in my life that have led me to pursue going back to school. Being obedient to this secondary and individual call on my life has required me to step out in faith. I think this will be part of the journey that bring more clarity to determining what God is calling me to do in the next stage of my life.
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